spring fashion, soup, suck-you-in undies, selfies, squished grapes and a pineapple

spring fashion, soup, suck-you-in undies, selfies, squished grapes and a pineapple

Would you believe Target is sponsoring another fashion post written by me?

It may have been hard to tell from the tumbleweeds on the blog but it’s been a very exciting couple of weeks in Casa de Cooker.  There was a conference on the Gold Coast, a camping holiday and of course the recovery mission.

In the midst of all the chaos I managed a child-free afternoon to hit the shops.  I was ready to give my wardrobe a freshen up for Spring, but my first stop was a little Japanese restaurant for some precious moments alone sustenance.  As I finished the massive bowl of soup, it dawned on me that I may have overdone it.  I said a silent note of thanks to the designers of Sunshine Plaza, when the travelator delivered me straight to the door of Target.

First order of business was trying on three versions of Target’s new secret sculpt dress with inbuilt shaping.  I was instantly drawn to this polka dot number, but even its magical powers/structural engineering were unable to distract me from the fact that I’d just eaten my body weight in udon noodle soup.

I love me some polka dots and udon soup

I love me some polka dots and udon soup

The dress code for the conference cocktail party was dressy with a splash of Tropicana, so I spent some time investigating the vast array of colourful headwear that has arrived in store just in time for the Spring Carnival – if you’re fond of a fascinator, Target is certainly worthy of a pre-Melbourne Cup luncheon visit ladies.  I considered sporting this little floral number to the cocktail party, but upon consideration, I realised that I didn’t have the intestinal fortitude to wear something so lairy to a function where I stood to meet hundreds of new people.

eat your heart out, Carmen Miranda!

eat your heart out, Carmen Miranda!

So I did what any self-respecting woman having a fat day does; I headed to the shoe department and when I couldn’t choose between a couple of pairs of fabulously festive footwear, I bought both.  Then I swung by the underwear department to invest in some quality foundation wear, because suck-you-in undies are the friend of the over indulger.

I couldn't decide, so I bought both.  How very Carrie of me!

I couldn’t decide, so I bought both. How very Carrie of me!

The red sandals served me well at the conference cocktail party although I did slip them off at one point – it’s not every day a girl is given the chance to squish grapes with her bare feet!  In hindsight, if Em could sport a pineapple corsage, I could have totally pulled off the South Pacific inspired headband.

I’m giving away another $50 Target voucher this month, to win you must subscribe via email or facebook and leave a comment below and in honour of my first grape crushing experience, tell me:

what have you squished between your toes?


When I asked this question, I knew I’d get some great answers!Janine's winning comment

Congratulations Janine, goldfish entrails takes the cake (and the voucher!)



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  1. 1

    Love suck-you-in-undies! Couldn’t live without them:) xo

  2. 3

    Hehehehe, your posts always give me a chuckle!! Awesome collage of PB pics and I do hope you invested in those polka dots -you looked fabulous in them xxxx

  3. 4

    I love the green shoes – no wonder you got both pairs! A great collage of photos there, love the pineapple pic, I didn’t get one of self! As you know I have a great love affair with sucky in undies, they are worth their weight in beige ugliness!!! I have to say I have squished cow, sheep and turkey poo in between my toes, not on purpose but when I was about 14/15 and had to feed the chocks, give the dogs a run about 5-6pm – I used to dash to do jobs in between TV ads and I sprinted barefoot and always invariably ended up with poo between my toes :(
    Ps, did you see my blog post about shoe gone missing, written in jest I promise xx

  4. 5

    When I was 12, I was wandering around our front yard at twilight. Filling the cat bowl at the tap I think, and naturally you do that kind of thing barefoot. Heading back to the veranda with my feet stepping through the damp, ankle length grass I felt a most appalling squish as my foot landed. Lifting it up in horror, I found a flattened frog blinking up at at me, while a low groaning croak came from him. I’ve never felt anything more disgusting under my foot, but that squished frog was gone by morning – I like to think he reinflated but I suspect he dragged himself away to die a slow, flattened, noisy death. Facebook fan 😉

  5. 6

    I once squished a bee between my toes, a rather painful experience that made me rather paranoid about walking around barefoot for a while!

  6. 7

    Love the shoes & the dress looks awesome on you! I hate shapewear, but it is a necessary evil post-babies!
    The most recent toe-squishing incident in our house involved a lump of play dough – it felt nice & cool underfoot – not so nice trying to get it out of the rug! *SIGH*

  7. 8

    I keep squishing purple grapes between my toes because my toddler keeps spitting them onto the floor instead of eating them!

  8. 9

    My recent toe squishing incident is not that nice my 6 month old baby girl has reflux yesterday I was on to my second set of clothes and had changed into shorts as it was a bit warmer and the vomit ran down my leg onto my foot then between my toes lucky Hubby was home I handed him the baby and got straight into the shower!! Hoping the reflux stops soon yuck!! :-(

  9. 10

    A disgusting tiger slug, those huge ones that come out during the night. I stupidly thought I could quickly run outside in the dark to put something in the bin, and squish. It was off, so wrong, horrible & yucky an understatement. Wouldn’t have been so bad if it was a quick splat, but it went between my toes, so wrong :(

  10. 11

    Happy to discover you and have liked on FB.

    Eeeewww!… I’ve spent winter squishing little balls of cotton wool between my toes… There was something nasty at the public pool I suspect and I’ve been battling it ever since – especially while my tootsies have been wrapped inside winter shoes. Can’t wait for summer’s sandals and fresh air!

  11. 12

    Crunchy crispy Christmas beetles. It was disgusting!

  12. 13

    A snail- that horrible crunching sound! But when you hear it it’s just too late. Makes my skin crawl just thinking about it!

  13. 14

    Spending the day at the beach on my 16th birthday I squished upon a jellyfish with my foot and was in terrible pain thinking this was the worst birthday ever. Until three young, hot and shirtless lifesavers came down to offer there assistance. They carried me up to the tent, held ice on my stings and chatted/flirted for ages. Best. Birthday. Ever!
    Am a liker on FB.

  14. 15

    We had a septic tank when I was a kid. There was a grease trap to collect all the grease and crap from the kitchen sink, it hadn’t been emptied for years, I couldn’t work out why my parents didn’t want to do it so I offered to. I was a tomboy and just got stuck into it,I didn’t mind getting dirty, the grease sludge got squished between my toes and lots of other places too. It wasn’t till I had a shower and realised that the smell of rancid grease wasn’t going to go away, for days it stayed with mei! That’s something I will never offer to do again!!

  15. 17

    Love the pics of you all! (and those feathery fans….)

  16. 18

    I love that polka-dot dress! Target really do have some great stuff, don’t they.

  17. 19

    I have squeezed my fiance’s tongue in between my toes, yes gross I know!

  18. 20

    Looks like you guys had an awesome time at the PB event! So how does squishing grapes under your feet feel? You are so photogenic – gorgeous photos! I love both pairs of shoes and would have done exactly as you did – bought both! lol

  19. 21

    My dad used to make his own plonk when I was a kid, so I’ve been the grape squasher, lots of fun when you’re a kid. PB looked like lots of fun for all of you too :)

  20. 22

    I so wished I could say that I have squished wine between my toes, but unfortunately my life is far too boring!!
    After five boys, many many different animals through out our family lifetime – is there any need for me to put into words what I have accidentally stepped on in my lifetime? Both in the back yard and in our lounge room floor? You think that by now I would learn to wear shoes inside as well as out side…mind you its been awhile since I have had children young enough to have those accidents {did I just jinx myself? – sure hope not!}
    And btw that head gear would have looked perfect for the cocktail party :)

  21. 23
    Mary Preston says:

    Ages ago, until I came to my senses, I decided to have my own rice paddy. We eat a LOT of rice, so I decided I would grow our own supply. Very eco & green & stupid of me. I had a nice muddy patch that I flooded each day with water. I grew some superb weedy nut-grass, wasted a lot of rainwater and yes, squished through a lot of mud. Rice growing is obviously a skill I don’t possess.

  22. 24

    The worst would have to be dog poo and a fresh, warm one at that. I still remember it squishing through my toes and on the top of my feet. My toe nails grew a few mm after that incident.

  23. 25

    Haha! How awesome! Love those mint green shoes!
    And that photo of us!!! Man, where did you get that? I needs me a copy! :)
    What have I squished between my toes? Oh, you know the usual – sand, mud, twinlet poo :)

  24. 26

    I squish about 2 cockroaches a day – early in the morning when I wake up, and late at night before bed. I don’t turn on the lights, so I probably squish a lot of other things that I don’t know about :/

  25. 27
    Kerrie Moss says:

    Take a seat, I have a tale to tell,
    A tale that didn’t really end well,
    One morning on my way to the shops,
    Eager to go, out the door I hopped,
    Said bye to the cat, he stared, big eyes,
    I should have known, but to my surprise,
    Slipped on my new stylish shoes,
    And discovered where last night the cat had spewed!

    (subscribed on Facebook! )

  26. 28
    Tanya Clarke says:

    I’ve done this a few times. It’s night time and I’m getting stuff out of the car and into the house. Snails crushed, squished and between the toes. Ewww.

  27. 29

    I got up in the middle of the night to go to the loo, stepped on something wet and squishy that popped when I trod on it, screamed and freaked out, turned the light on and found Goldie our goldfishes guts squished between my toes. He had jumped out of the fishbowl.

  28. 30

    Squished a juicy little thing but not quite as tasty as a grape… oh yes, the horrible creepy crawler that plagues the darkest recesses of homes… A COCKROACH! Crying…

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